So here we go again, at the helm of another whirlwind.
Nothing horrible, nothing stellar.
Just to be.
I've been experimenting lately.
Perhaps that's not the word I'm looking for. It sounds too focused.
I've been "testing the waters" lately, in one peculiar aspect of life.
Stretching my boundaries, expanding my comfort zones.
Of course, all of this w/o the proper know how on how to keep it under control.
I am an expert at feigning control. Naive about implementing it.
It's a parlous line I walk, over dicey circumstances that I want nothing to do w/.
And still, I am here.
I can blame everyone. Blame loneliness, blame faces, blame the situation.
Eventually, it all leads back to me.
I have not yet grasped the process in which one asserts limits and expectations.
Where was that in the "Life" instruction manual?
I have a feeling it's going to be a few tumultuous episodes before the understanding of the "power", so to speak, comes to me.
Here's to hoping.
