I have never been this excited and terrified for anything before.
I've moved states, several times, sneaked out, gotten arrested, and had a baby. Still, nothing has ever made me feel these two emotions so intensely and simultaneously before. And as I stand here at what seems to be the beginning of the end for Cole and I, this is exactly what is coursing through my veins at this moment. Everything I've ever actually taken the time to plan out for myself is crumbling. All the plans I've made in the last 3 years are blowing away like ashes. My whole life viewpoint has suddenly been disrupted, and there's the awful possibility that I was wrong all along staring me in the face. Despite all of this, it's like all of the sudden the mist is clearing and I can see things I could not before. I'm opening my eyes, and I'm realizing that everything I knew all along was seen through someone else's eyes. I've been taking what I'm given for so long that I forgot there was a possibility to do it myself. And now, I'm curious to the idea. CAN I do it? Am I capable? Will I crash and burn like everyone expects or will I rise above everything I've ever allowed to get in my way? And if I do, if I make it passed every wall and every block I encounter... then what?
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